


Drawing Constellations ('Til the Stars Align)

by shrimpheavenwow



Series: Hiraeth [2]
Category: Polygon/McElroy Vlogs & Podcasts RPF
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, Making Out, slight angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-19
Updated: 2019-07-19
Packaged: 2020-07-08 22:36:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19877197
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shrimpheavenwow/pseuds/shrimpheavenwow
Summary: Brian goes home, and this time it isn't to Baltimore





	Drawing Constellations ('Til the Stars Align)

**Author's Note:**

> Did someone order some maple syrup? Bc this shit SAPPY
> 
> Sequel to [this](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18978277) but mostly makes sense on its own. It took me like two months to write this but that's just how it be sometimes. Unbeta'd so sorry for any mistakes. Also there's almost certainly another series with this name but like, I'm too lazy to check/find another one oops
> 
> Title from Strange by Big Thief

The first thing Brian did when he got home was fling open the door, drop his bags, and more or less throw himself at Pat, wrapping his arms tightly around his waist. 

Pat, to his credit, managed to stay upright, only stumbling one step backward in surprise. He returned the hug easily, holding him close.

“Hey kid,” he laughed. “How’re you feeling?”

“I  _ missed  _ you,” Brian said into Pat’s shirt. He was firm and warm against him and Brian had never felt more secure in where he was.

“You were barely gone four days.”

“And I missed you every  _ second _ of them.”

Pat chuckled and tightened his grip, pulling Brian just that much closer. 

“I missed you too.” 

Brian raised his head from where it was buried in Pat’s chest, repositioning his arms so they were draped around Pat’s neck. Pat’s hands slid down Brian’s torso, sending shivers down his spine, before settling loosely on his hips. He looked up into Pat’s eyes, so excited that he felt practically manic. 

“I love you. I love you so much. I’ve been waiting the whole trip back to tell you that in person.” His smile was so wide it was starting to hurt his cheeks, but he didn’t care. He was happy. He was so incredibly happy. Pat smiled back, sincere and reserved but just as fond as Brian felt.

“I love you too, ya goof, now kiss me.”

Brian’s grin grew impossibly wider as he grabbed Pat’s collar and pulled him towards him, connecting their lips. They were both smiling too much for it to be a proper kiss, but it didn’t matter. They were together, and they loved each other, and everything was perfect.

Brian could feel his blush spread wide over his face as they pulled away, a heat that he could practically feel coming from Pat’s face as well, similarly pink. He leaned forward and rested his forehead against Pat’s, closing his eyes and breathing out a sigh. Pat slowly rocked them from side to side, a sort of half-assed two step that neither could be bothered to really think about.

After a long moment, Brian leaned back, a softer smile on his face than before. He fiddled with Pat’s collar, rolling the fabric between his fingers.

“Take a nap with me Pat Gill, I’ve been driving all day.”

“Brian, it’s-” he lifted his hand to check his watch, “5:30.”

“Doesn’t matter, it’s always nap time.” Pat gave him a look. Brian pouted in response. “Please?”

He chuckled against him. “Okay, you go ahead, I'll be there in a second.”

Brian gave him a quick kiss. “Be quick, I’ve been looking forward to cuddling you for forever,” he said, before turning and heading down the hall to the bedroom.

He changed into his comfy clothes and promptly flopped face first onto the bed. He heard a laugh from the doorway.

“You alright?

“I'm never leaving this bed again,” Brian groaned into the blanket. The bed dipped as Pat laid down next to him. He rolled over, draping his arm around Pat. “Hi,” he said with a grin. Pat responded with a smile just as big, is not bigger.

“Hi,” he said. 

Brian gave him a peck on the lips. And then another, but slightly longer. When he went in the third time, Pat stopped him from moving away and pulled him into a deeper, longer, heavier kiss. There was heat in Pat’s eyes when they parted, a heat that Brian didn’t know if he had the energy for, but was willing to keep kissing him till it came time for them to find out. 

Brian tugged at the side of Pat’s shirt, attempting to halfheartedly pull him on top of him. Pat chuckled as he moved to straddle Brian.

“I thought you wanted to nap,” He teased.

“Well, now I want to kiss you.”

Pat’s expression grew serious as he leaned in. That was something Brian would never stop loving -- the intensity of Pat’s gaze before he kissed him. 

The kiss started slow, a gradual build that didn’t speed up so much as it just became more intense. Pat’s hand slid down Brian’s body in a soft caress. 

He pulled away suddenly with a noise of alarm.

“Ow! Oh, fuck you, asshole,” he laughed. 

“What’s wrong?” Brian asked in mock innocence, though a giggle bubbled up into his words, betraying his false concern. 

“You bit my tongue, you piece of shit!” Pat said, smiling, swinging his legs over the edge of the bed. Brian crawled over to him, wrapping his arms around Pat’s shoulders from behind. He rested his chin on Pat’s shoulder.

“Noooo, don’t leave,” he crooned.

“Why shouldn’t I?”

“Because I love youuu.”

“You have an odd way of showing it.”

“Pleeeaassee?” he begged. “I’ll be good, I promise.”

Pat snorted. “I don’t know how much I believe that.”

Brian drew Pat’s cheek to his lips, placing an exaggerated kiss on Pat’s cheek. “Do you forgive me?” Brian asked. 

“No.” Pat’s face was drawn in mock seriousity, a flimsy resolve that Brian knew he could break.

Brian repeated his action, this time on Pat’s jaw. “What about now?”

“ _ No _ ,” Pat reiterated, but the force of his tone was ruined by the smile in his voice. Brian’s face split into a grin as he pulled Pat backwards, maneuvering them so that he now he was stradling Pat, peppering his face with little kisses as Pat laughed. It was hearty and full and the most beautiful sound Brian had ever heard.

“Stop! Stop, please!” Pat laughed, breathless. Brian relented, lifting his head so that he could look Pat in the eyes. Pat panted beneath him, smile wide and genuine. “You’re a child,” he teased.

“You love me anyway.”

Pat hummed, snaking a hand just barely under Brian’s shirt, tracing patterns across his lower back, sweet and soft and easy. His other hand raised to stroke Brian’s cheek as he let out a sigh.

“You’re beautiful,” he half whispered, an intense look settling on his face. Brian quirked a smile.

“I try,” he joked, but Pat’s expression didn’t change. Instead, he took one of Brian’s hands, toying with his fingers as he drew it up from the bed and onto his chest, over the steady, distant thumping of his heart. Brian’s fingers flexed against him.

“I love you,” Pat responded, and the weight of it hit Brian like a ton of bricks. Pat’s gaze was so deeply sincere and vulnerable and unguarded in a way that Brian rarely saw and he had to will himself not to cry as tears started to fill his eyes because he understood. He really did.

“I love you too,” he croaked, voice cracking as a stray tear escaped down his cheek. A flicker of emotion crossed Pat’s face as he attempted a smile, moving his hand to wipe the tear from Brian’s face.

“Don’t start crying, you’ll make me cry,” he tried to kid, but his eyes betrayed him by starting to tear up as well. 

Brian sniffled and laughed wetly. “I know, I’m sorry, I’m just….” He inhaled and let out a shaky sigh. “I’m just glad I’m home.”

Pat nodded. He pulled Brian into another kiss. As they broke apart, he guided Brian so that his head was against his chest, their bodies flush against each other.

“Me too,” he murmured into Brian’s ear.

**********

Brian lay in bed hours later, curled up next to a sleeping Pat, their legs intertwined. He took advantage of the quiet moment to observe him, to run his eyes over the softness of his features in the dim light of night time. His hair was splayed across his face and pillow, curling at his chin, his mouth slightly parted in slow, steady breathing. 

Brian sighed softly. He was so lucky to be with Pat, to have him next to time and be able to see him and kiss him and hold him. It was a miracle that they’d even met. 

The thought made Brian pause. It really  _ was _ crazy that they’d met. If Brian hadn’t gotten the job at Polygon, he’d still be watching Pat on his computer screen. More than that, if Brian hadn’t gotten the job, he might not have been able to afford his apartment. He might’ve even had to move back home if things had gotten really bad. 

He tensed up. This was a dangerous path of “what if”’s but Brian couldn’t stop himself from going down it. What would life be like if he’d had to move back? Or even before that, what if he’d never moved away at all? Would he still be back in Baltimore, a place that wasn’t quite a home to him anymore, desperately trying to get a job with his writing degree? He’d have never met Pat or Simone or Jenna or Clayton or-

No. He had to stop before he overwhelmed himself. But it was already too late. He felt his heart start to race, his breathing pick up, his body not listening when he tried to stop the tears from forming in his eyes. He tried and failed to subtly extract his legs from Pat’s, waking him in the process. He stirred and opened his eyes, blinking at the darkness.

“Babe?” He croaked. “Everything alright?”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Brian lied, but his voice shook. Pat moved closer, wrapping his arms around him to hold him. 

“What’s wrong?” Pat asked, voice still heavy with sleep but full of concern. Brian trembled in his arms, guilty at having woken him up but so scared of him pulling away.

“It’s nothing, I just freaked myself out.”

“How so?”

Brian let out a shaky breath.

“I just uh,” he stumbled. He lifted a hand between them, as he opened his mouth to speak, but he couldn’t find the words. The hand closed into a fist and dropped uselessly to the bed. He laughed, mirthless. He took another breath and tried again. 

“I was just thinking about how, if things had worked out the way I thought they would when I was younger, I probably would never have come to New York, and then I would’ve never met you and I’d still be back in Baltimore, all alone, and you would’ve had no idea I existed and I wouldn’t have any of the friends I have and-” Brian rambled until his voice broke and he started to sob. Pat pulled him tight against him, stroking his hair.

“Shhh, shhh it’s okay baby, let it out,” he whispered into Brian’s hair. Brian tried to stifle his gasps but couldn’t quite mask the resulting hiccup. He tried not to feel embarrassed, tried not to be too embarrassing, and instead focused on just releasing all the pent up anxiety in his chest. 

Pat held him for a while as he cried, apparently uncaring that his shirt was getting soaked. After a bit, Brian pulled away, sniffling. He’d stopped crying, but couldn’t help the tremors wracking his body.

“I’m sorry,” he sobbed dryly, trembling. “I’m sorry, this is so  _ stupid. _ You’re right here and you love me but I’m still so scared of losing you.”

“Brian, baby, listen to me. It’s alright. You’re fine. You’re not going to lose me.”

Brian nodded, eyes cast low onto the bed. He toyed with the hem of Pat’s shirt.

“You should probably take this off,” he suggested, trying to change the subject. 

“You trying to get me naked, Gilbert?” Pat teased.

“It’s my only goal at any given time.”

Pat chuckled and gingerly removed his arms from how they were wrapped around Brian, sat up, and shucked off his shirt. He turned back to Brian and took his hands, making him sit up, just slightly. He looked him in the eyes. Brian tried his best to return his gaze, but in the low light of the room, it was hard to quite see the exact emotion in his face.

“Brian,” Pat started, “it doesn’t matter what could’ve happened. There are a lot of things that could’ve happened, but they didn’t. You and I are together, right here, right now. That’s all you have to think about, okay? Can you take a deep breath for me?”

Brian nodded, his eye dropping. He inhaled as Pat counted: in, hold, out. He started to calm down some, though more exhausted than before. 

“Thank you, Patrick,” he whispered. Pat nodded.

“Anytime. You okay?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m just tired now.”

“Okay. Let’s get you to sleep then.”

Brian lowered himself back down so he was facing away from Pat, their hands still enjoined. He guided the arm so it was wrapped around his waist. Pat curled up close against Brian’s back, forehead against his neck. A moment passed in silence before Pat spoke again.

“Brian?” he asked.

“Yeah?”

“I’d follow you to the ends of the Earth, you know that?”

Brian’s heart picked up a little in his chest. 

“Yeah. I know you would.”

Pat squeezed his hand, and as Brian drifted off, all he could think about was warmth and comfort and the all encompassing love of the man behind him. Everything was going to be okay. It was all going to be fine. The past and future didn’t matter, because he had all that he needed right there. Brian smiled to himself, and fell asleep.

**Author's Note:**

> It's not a real fluff fic unless they cry 
> 
> Hmu on tumblr @ gunraveled


End file.
